❤

Monday, 5 January 2015 ♥

Happy New Year :(

Dear Blogger,

Hope it's not too late for me to say Happy New Year.

I broke up with Asik on 27/12/2014 but we getback 5 hours later.

He changed. His not the person i used to love. I gave him another chance thought he would change but right now his beggining to smoke and is getting close with girls. I admit i am JEALOUS. I do't want to confront him cause he will think i'm over-reacting. I tried once and he said if i don't like the new him, i can leave. HOW EASY FOR HIM TO SAY THAT? I wish everything was back like before. His nothing like he used to be. It feels like i'm with a stranger. How long will this last? Is this love still worth fighting for?

Right now we don't contact each other because he has no credit and I MISS HIM VERY MUCH. Sometimes i thought to myself, Does he miss me like i miss him? Does he even think about me? I hope he does because my heart will be shattered into pieces if he don't. The sad part about missing someone is you don't know if they miss back. I'm crying like crazy and his probably happy right now. I hope this Friday we will meet. I have to spend time with him before i go back to school which is on 12/01/2015. I hope if we meet we will be sweet as ever cause our relationship is sour right now.

Asik has been hanging out with Yana(Brendan's Ex) and i'll be lying if i say i'm not JEALOUS. I know how Yana is when she is with boys and i don't like it. I can't imagine Yana and him so close together until Yana post about asik on wechat. Besides that, theres this girl name her name is zati she always comment on asik's post. is like they're close. Asik once asked me who she is and i said i don't know. If he don't who she is how can they be so close? I'm being so insecure right now and full of doubts because of asik. Is this the reason why he is changing? Is he cheating on me? Is he bored of me? Is he just using me? hmm I wish i could read his mind but i'm scared i won't be able to handle the truth :( Real feelings don't just go away...

I really don't know what to do right now. I just wish asik was his old self again. The one that i USED to love so much because the new one sucks. :(